with mother's day just around the corner, i wanted to shine a glittering spotlight on two of my favorite cinematic moms: francine fishpaw of polyester and edna turnblad of hairspray. portrayed to perfection by the multi-fabulous Divine, both mothers overcome adversity in the land of pretty people and cruel cats.
in addition, motherhood poses a handful of harrowing hurdles for these sassy ladies -- from town slut daughters and foot fetish sons, to cheating pornographer husbands and teenage runaways. mama's bouffant can only handle so much pressure.
so let's give them something special this sunday. in addition, let's honor the late, great Divine for embodying mothers, and women with sass and crass, who are larger than life:
above: gifting a leopard print damaris silk-chiffon playsuit (145.00) and leopard gloves (250.00) may not be appropriate for some mothers, but when your mother is divine, it's inappropriate not to; a one day princess tiara (30.00) and elva fields brass & pearl necklace (168.00) is the perfect pairing for any mother's day portrait; music for tv dinners (59.98) complements mom's microwave meatloaf and pedro garcia's cha cha cha (7.99) is the best way to burn off the guilt; no need for mom to shoplift a slab of meat beneath her dress (as divine demonstrated in pink flamingos) when she can have a shoplifter tote bag (25.00); replenish mom's supply of tokyomilk dead sexy perfum (28.00) and make up forever's feather-tipped eyelashes (15.00) -- she'll thank you for it; teroforma whiskey rocks and glasses (60.00) keeps her favorite booze chilled; and, divine's never ending wish for cha cha heels will be fulfilled with a pair of go see platforms (114.99) and discolilou christian louboutins (895.00).
above: francine fishpaw can give the pesky paparazzi a taste of their own medicine with an optrixx camera profile (10.00); jonathan adler's hashish candle (68.00) is second best to polyester's odorama card; meals will no longer be a mystery with these retro recipe cards (9.95) and sandwich shaped cake pan (28.00); no home is complete without a set of pink lawn flamingos (59.99); bacon toothpicks (2.50) provide bacon zest without the greasy mess; and finally, a table saw cake cutter (9.00) -- perfect for birthdays or breaking out of jail. after all, mom likes to be prepared for all occasions.
love you, Divine. you are a true WHORANGE hero. xoxo
Comments
This gift guide is truly Divine. Brava!
Posted by: Trudy Tyler | May 03, 2010 at 05:42 AM
so fun! love the door mat.
Posted by: Alyssa | May 03, 2010 at 05:55 AM
HaHa! This gift guide made my day! Divine is one of my favorite performers. She is very mused.
Posted by: Lolly | May 03, 2010 at 10:36 AM
Oops I meant to say she is a very good muse!
Posted by: Lolly | May 03, 2010 at 10:46 AM
Wow, Divine in Christian Louboutins! She would so work those heels harder than JLo and Oprah combined.
Posted by: Georgie | May 03, 2010 at 12:43 PM
BEST POST EVER!
Posted by: LesMag | May 03, 2010 at 05:30 PM
Where are Francine's and Edna's diet pills? They do love their diet pills.
Posted by: Simone | May 03, 2010 at 05:44 PM
I know she loves her diet pills, but I just can't be her enabler!
Posted by: tula | May 03, 2010 at 06:21 PM
A large selection for all occasions!
Posted by: AG | May 04, 2010 at 09:34 PM
Brilliant. Simply brilliant.
Posted by: Olivia Stewart | May 07, 2010 at 12:04 PM