if you follow me on instagram, you know platform sandals happen on me for a reason. my goals are high, darlings. my goals are high.

{rainbow 2 platform sandal available for a billion dollars at ferragamo.}

kittens, marc jacob's ny fashion week party invite just arrived and i am RSVPing YES for you and me!

here's the skinny: marc's september soiree is a book launch for gloss: the work of chris von wangenheim. if you are not familiar with mr. wangenheim's photography you gotta check it out! his notorious lens captured the coke and lamé filled '70s better than anybody. his muses were the denizens of studio 54, supermodel gia, and dobermans. He was even the inspiration behind the 1978 film the eyes of laura mars, which is one of the trashiest (i.e. most fabulous) fashion photography/horror flicks ever made. 

now, onto the party!

mr. jacobs' fashionable fete will honor chris von wangenheim with the swankiest, sickest, most sequined, and sans subtle dress code ever! in fact, he is so passionate about the party attire, he even specified it with all caps in his invite.

the instructions read:

STRICT DRESS TO KILL CODE WILL BE ENFORCED: FUR COATS OVER LINGERE, LIP GLOSS, JERRY HALL SIDE-SWEPT HAIR, SEQUINS, GOLD LAME TURBANS, PATTI HEARST SYMBIONESE LIBERATION ARMY GEAR, ROGUE, ROLLERINA CHIC, SHEER HAREM PANTS, MINI SKIRTS AND MUSCULAR LEGS, PLATINUM RECORDS AS HEAD GEAR, SEQUINS, GRACE JONES BUTCH REALNESS, GLOSS-Y SKIN, BLEACHED EYEBROWS, SLITS, RIDING IN ON A WHITE HORSE, SEQUINS, SKY HIGH STILETTOS, MIRRORED AVIATORS, METAL MESH, COWL NECKLINE HALTERS, OR EYES OF LAURA MARS CHIC. NO FLAT SHOES. NO MATTE SURFACES. NO NATURAL LOOKS.

 let's unpack these looks, shall we?

{above: "riding in on a white horse": bianca jagger's birthday party at studio 54.}

{above: "grace jones butch realness" and "record as head gear."}

{above: an oscar-worthy moment from "the eyes of laura mars."}

{above: "sequins," "see through harem pants," "gold lamé," and "no natural looks" courtesy of cher, elton john, and diana ross.

{above: "rollerena chic" -- aka the fairy godmother of the east village.}

{halston and jagger sandwich. that was on the list, right?}

{above left: "jerry hall side swept hair"; above right: divine models "rogue" and "no matte surfaces."}

{model donna jordan brings her "bleached out brows."}

{above: diane von furstenberg's "sky high stilettos."}

{above: anjelica huston and a studio 54 go-go dancer in "sequins" and "lamé."}

{above: andy warhol and bianca jagger's "patty hearst symbionese liberation army gear."}

{above: grace jones. 'nuff said.}

so, what are we wearing, darling? i think we should for the "fur coat over lingerie" story. and gold...lots of gold!

and, of course, i'll pack the polaroid camera, because you know andy would want me to.

here we go...

{above: 1. marc jacobs 60mm sunglasses; 2. vintage faux fur coat; 3. mac 44 eyelashes; 4. la perla sirene sequined halterneck bikini; 5. hot tools 24k gold 1" salon curling iron; 6. alexis bittar ribbon cuff bracelet; 7. aurélie bidermann's gold-plated brass 'marella' earrings; 8. nails inc galaxy; 9. wolford daria mesh dot tights; 10. rafe crescent and stars necklace five and two; 11. BCBGmaxazria bronze black dena heel; 12. bando twist scarf in metallic gold; 13. stila magnificent metals foil finish eye shadow; 14. eva cocktail ring; 15. whiting & davis convertible mesh clutch; 16. mac ruby woo lipglass; 17. mac superslick gold liquid eye liner in pure show; impossible vintage polaroid SX-70 starter camera.}

marriage equality has been such a long and hard-fought struggle for so many. i am proud to be an american today. this is a powerful and profound moment for this country. ‪

cheers to my gay and lesbian friends, family, and loved ones!!! raising a glass to the present and future. #‎LoveWins‬

darlings, this is a rare glimpse into the fine art of unicorn grooming. yes, even magical creatures have bad hair days.

{cotton candy brush via we heart it.}

darlings!

it's been soooooo long. how are you? how's the hair? are your hot rollers treating you right?

i'm slowly climbing aboard the blogging bus and i hope you're along for the ride. cocktails are on me and everyone gets a jaunty hat, of course. so many great places to frolic. ready to boogie? let's do this thing!

xoxo,
tula

kittens, i have tried every single pinky, nudey, rosey lipstick on this unicorn planet. from sticks to stains to sheers, i am always on the search for the perfect pinky shade that will take me from palisades client meetings to downtown go-go dancing.

after years of tint testing, i've composed my top ten lippy picks below. these go-to gals can be worn solo or layered in any combo. they all work well together much unlike our congress.

do you have any favorite pinky neutrals? let me know and i'll give 'em a spin!

{above: 1). nars dolce vita sheer lipstick; 2). lancome laque fever in rose macaroon; 3). MAC velvet teddy lipstick; 4. nars dolce vita velvet matte lip liner; 5. bobbi brown rose lip liner; 6. smith's rosebud salve (clear! use in combination with lip pencils); 7. julie hewett bette cheekie palette; 8. laura mercier naked lip pencil; 9. bobbi brown roseberry lipstick; 10. julie hewett biba lipstick.}

** please note, i'm totally not paid by any of these companies. i'm just a lipstick whore.

it's monday, darlings...

some of us are returning to the grind. others are bikini-clad and roller skating down the beach promenade in aruba.

if you're joining me in the glorious grind, let's meditate upon a few get-me-through-the-day slogans, shall we? each phrase is perfect for chanting during your commute, while sitting at your desk, or in a board meeting.

FUN FACT: if you add the words "in a disco" to the end of any of these phrases, your day will improve 150%. guaranteed!

example: "i woke up like this in a disco."

example: "you rule sorta in a disco."

happy monday, kittens!

{images: "daydream believer" by jocelyn anderson for friends of type; "i woke up like this" via they all hate us; "you rule sorta" aka "champoo" by erik marinovich for  friends of type.}

greta grossman floor lamp - need.

fired earth floor tile - want.

armchair - now, please.

brass pineapple container - gimme.

{via the designer pad.}

eye rug.

eye pillow.

eye want.

{mara hoffman rug for anthropologie.}

isn't she fantastic?

pretty soon this talented lady will receive a real oscar, but for now, a lego oscar will do just fine.