it's that time of the year again -- oscars.

i confess, i am not very excited by the show this year. the lack of diversity in the nominees have me down and frustrated. i was really disappointed by the lack of oscar acknowledgement for selma last year. this year is even worse with the exclusion of idris elba, beasts of no nation, director cary joji fukunaga, actor abraham attah, and straight outta compton. also, excluding transgender singer anohni from the awards show is so, so terrible!

however, i will watch the show as i watched it since i was four months old. also, my superpower is correctly predicting the winners, (i've won the oscar pool 15 times in the past 16 years!), so i'm going to give it another crack this year.

i've only seen a handful of films this year (i usually see them all), partially due to my lack of enthusiasm and nominee disappointment. for the record, my favorite films this year were ex machina and mad max: fury road.

okay, let's get on with the predictions. keep in mind, i vote head over heart. that is key to winning the oscar kitty. hence...sylvester stallone.

HERE WE GO:

best picture: spotlight (this category is the BIGGEST toss up! i'm going with the underdog. winner may be the revenant or big short, though.)

best director: alejandro iñárritu (the revenant)

best actor: leonardo dicaprio (the revenant)

best actress: brie larson (room)

best supporting actor: sylvester stallone (creed)

best supporting actress: alicia vikander (the danish girl)

best adapted screenplay: charles randolph and adam mckay (the big short)

best original screenplay: josh singer and tom mccarthy (spotlight)

best animated feature: inside out

documentary feature: amy

foreign language film: son of saul

best cinematography: the revenant (emmanuel lubezki)

best costume design: mad max: fury road (jenny beavan)

best film editing: mad max: fury road (margaret sixel)

best original song: "til it happens to you" from "the hunting ground" (lady gaga)

best makeup & hair styling:mad max: fury road (lesley vanderwalt, elka wardega and damian martin)

best production design: mad max: fury road (colin gibson - production design; lisa thompson - set decoration)

best original score: the hateful eight (ennio morricone)

best sound editing: the revenant (martin hernandez and lon bender)

best sound mixing: the revenant (jon taylor, frank montaño, randy thom and chris duesterdiek)

best visual effects: star wars: the force awakens (roger guyett, patrick tubach, neal scanlan and chris corbould)

best animated short: sanjay’s super team

best documentary short: body team 12

best live action short: shok

there you go, darlings. now go primp for the red carpet! oh, and my guess for best dressed: alicia vikander.

kittens, marc jacob's ny fashion week party invite just arrived and i am RSVPing YES for you and me!

here's the skinny: marc's september soiree is a book launch for gloss: the work of chris von wangenheim. if you are not familiar with mr. wangenheim's photography you gotta check it out! his notorious lens captured the coke and lamé filled '70s better than anybody. his muses were the denizens of studio 54, supermodel gia, and dobermans. He was even the inspiration behind the 1978 film the eyes of laura mars, which is one of the trashiest (i.e. most fabulous) fashion photography/horror flicks ever made. 

now, onto the party!

mr. jacobs' fashionable fete will honor chris von wangenheim with the swankiest, sickest, most sequined, and sans subtle dress code ever! in fact, he is so passionate about the party attire, he even specified it with all caps in his invite.

the instructions read:

STRICT DRESS TO KILL CODE WILL BE ENFORCED: FUR COATS OVER LINGERE, LIP GLOSS, JERRY HALL SIDE-SWEPT HAIR, SEQUINS, GOLD LAME TURBANS, PATTI HEARST SYMBIONESE LIBERATION ARMY GEAR, ROGUE, ROLLERINA CHIC, SHEER HAREM PANTS, MINI SKIRTS AND MUSCULAR LEGS, PLATINUM RECORDS AS HEAD GEAR, SEQUINS, GRACE JONES BUTCH REALNESS, GLOSS-Y SKIN, BLEACHED EYEBROWS, SLITS, RIDING IN ON A WHITE HORSE, SEQUINS, SKY HIGH STILETTOS, MIRRORED AVIATORS, METAL MESH, COWL NECKLINE HALTERS, OR EYES OF LAURA MARS CHIC. NO FLAT SHOES. NO MATTE SURFACES. NO NATURAL LOOKS.

 let's unpack these looks, shall we?

{above: "riding in on a white horse": bianca jagger's birthday party at studio 54.}

{above: "grace jones butch realness" and "record as head gear."}

{above: an oscar-worthy moment from "the eyes of laura mars."}

{above: "sequins," "see through harem pants," "gold lamé," and "no natural looks" courtesy of cher, elton john, and diana ross.

{above: "rollerena chic" -- aka the fairy godmother of the east village.}

{halston and jagger sandwich. that was on the list, right?}

{above left: "jerry hall side swept hair"; above right: divine models "rogue" and "no matte surfaces."}

{model donna jordan brings her "bleached out brows."}

{above: diane von furstenberg's "sky high stilettos."}

{above: anjelica huston and a studio 54 go-go dancer in "sequins" and "lamé."}

{above: andy warhol and bianca jagger's "patty hearst symbionese liberation army gear."}

{above: grace jones. 'nuff said.}

so, what are we wearing, darling? i think we should for the "fur coat over lingerie" story. and gold...lots of gold!

and, of course, i'll pack the polaroid camera, because you know andy would want me to.

here we go...

{above: 1. marc jacobs 60mm sunglasses; 2. vintage faux fur coat; 3. mac 44 eyelashes; 4. la perla sirene sequined halterneck bikini; 5. hot tools 24k gold 1" salon curling iron; 6. alexis bittar ribbon cuff bracelet; 7. aurélie bidermann's gold-plated brass 'marella' earrings; 8. nails inc galaxy; 9. wolford daria mesh dot tights; 10. rafe crescent and stars necklace five and two; 11. BCBGmaxazria bronze black dena heel; 12. bando twist scarf in metallic gold; 13. stila magnificent metals foil finish eye shadow; 14. eva cocktail ring; 15. whiting & davis convertible mesh clutch; 16. mac ruby woo lipglass; 17. mac superslick gold liquid eye liner in pure show; impossible vintage polaroid SX-70 starter camera.}

isn't she fantastic?

pretty soon this talented lady will receive a real oscar, but for now, a lego oscar will do just fine.

kittens, it's that time of the year again -- OSCARS!

i confess, i have watched every academy award show since the beginning of time. the red carpet is my drug of choice. i even watch pre-red carpet coverage, because i am insane. 

AND, i have won every oscar pool (with the exception of one) for the past 15 years. because i love you, i am going to post my predictions here and hope that nobody at my oscar party steals my picks. i'm living life on the edge and i'm doing it for YOU, darlings!

feel free to use my psychic gift for your oscar party ballot. just split your spoils with me 50/50. you can pay me in gold and/or non-conflict diamonds.

please note, i have seen every film with the exception of american sniper. my favorite films were grand budapest hotel and whiplash. that being said, they will not win best picture. the key to winning the oscar pool is to vote with your head and not your heart.

okay, enough chit-chat. let's boogie on down to the WHORANGE ballot:

best picture: birdman

best director: richard linklater (boyhood)

best actor: eddie redmayne (theory of everything)

best actress: julianne moore (still alice)

best supporting actor: jk simmons (whiplash)

best supporting actress: patricia arquette (boyhood)

best adapted screenplay: the imitation game (graham moore)

best original screenplay: grand budapest hotel (wes anderson and hugo guinness)

best animated feature: how to train your dragon 2 (should be the lego movie...bastards!)

documentary feature: citizenfour

foreign language film: ida

best cinematography: birdman (emmanuel lubezki)

best costume design: grand budapest hotel (milena canonero)

best film editing: boyhood (sandra adair)

best makeup & hair styling: grand budapest hotel (frances hannon and mark coulier)

best production design: grand budapest hotel (adam stockhausen [production design] and anna pinnock [set decoration])

best original score: theory of everything (jóhann jóhannsson)

best sound editing: american sniper (alan robert murray and bub asman)

best sound mixing: whiplash (craig mann, ben wilkins and thomas curley)

best visual effects: interstellar (paul franklin, andrew lockley, ian hunter and scott fisher)

best animated short: feast (patrick osborne and kristina reed)

best documentary short: crisis hotline: veterans press 1

best live action short: the phone call

there you go, darlings. now go primp for the red carpet!

{top image: fake oscar statue photography by whorange. background art by brandi strickland.}

while packing up my tree yesterday, i realized my holiday ornaments would make the perfect cast for a 2015 remake of "drugstore cowboy."

if you haven't seen gus van sant's 1989 film about a band of drug addicts (lead by matt dillon) who support their habit by robbing pharmacies and hospitals, put in on your netflix queue. sure, it's dark and depressing, but it is really, really good. plus, the hair is amazing and the production design is gorgeously gritty.

i think my version would replace vicodin with swedish candy, though, because i love a good twist and i love a good gummy fish. also, there will be no guns in my version. just lassos. little twine lassos.

the cast would be as follows:

lasso raccoon - matt dillon

fur coat raccoon - kelly lynch

pink pant bunny - heather graham

denim lion - james legros

see the original trailer here for your inspiration pleasure. enjoy!

oh hello, darlings! remember me? i remember you. and let me say, you've never looked more smashing!

i'm opening the WHORANGE doors today to shine a spotlight on matt fox and enrique crame, the magnificent proprietors of new york's fine and dandy shop. this year, they won halloween with their head-to-toe channeling of concierge gustave h and lobby boy zero moustafa from the grand budapest hotel.

the threads. the vintage luggage. the mendl's box. the 'staches. the attitude. wes anderson would be proud!

congratulations, matt and enrique! thank you for keeping halloween haute and for always bringing how-to handsome to us all.

xo

{visit fine and dandy in NY's hell's kitchen district or shop their dapper wares online. you'll be glad you did!}

with mother's day just around the corner, i thought i'd shine a spotlight on a trio of moms who work tirelessly hard to achieve their dreams while navigating the complex social and political changes of the 1960s.

fuel up your lighters, kittens. mama wants a cigarette and a glass of OJ -- heavy on the vodka.

we are gifting the mothers of mad men.

we have BETTY DRAPER FRANCIS - former model, divorcee, mother of three, grace kelly look-a-like, chain smoking hair hopper, litter bug, and suburban ice princess. she once punished her son for trading her sandwich for a bag of gumdrops and sees her daughter as the mini-me thorn in her side.

nonetheless, mama betty will most definitely expect a swell gift this mother's day. best break open your piggy banks now, sally, bobby, and baby gene.

above: 1). gorham cocktail jigger 20th century; 2). keychain to the mansion; 3). love sandwich recipe book; 4). picnic egg caddy; 5). smoke & kisses bobbi set; 6). the row cat-eye acetate and leather sunglasses; 7). bow-embellished metallic lace pumps; 8). "embrace reality, even if it burns you" catchall; 9). compostable plates, bowls & trays.

next up is JOAN HARRIS -- whip smart secretary turned ambitious executive who struggles to prove her mind is just as powerful as her bombshell bod. 

separated from her much-loathed husband, she's a single mom in the late '60s, raising a son whose biological father is one of the founding partners of her firm.

joan is a WHORANGE hero and has been lovingly gifted in the past.

above: 1). ruffian x izola lady 3 oz. flask; 2). art of war by sun tzu; 3). tiger necklace by kenzo; 4). onward & upward water bottle; 5). art deco set of four tumblers by dorothy thorpe; 6). anna-karin karlsson rose rouge cat eye acetate sunglasses; 7). back me up mobile charger; 8. thea leather chelsea boots; 9). vestige lipstick holder; 10). brass pencil sharpener; 11). rosa iphone case.

 "what?" you say, "PEGGY OLSON is a mother?"

why, yes! if we reach back into the archives of season 1 and 2, we are reminded that secretary-turned-copy-chief-badass, peggy, was indeed impregnated by her married colleague, pete. their illegitimate son is (supposedly) being raised by peggy's mother or sister.

a strange storyline that seems to have been relegated to the circular file.

can we petition AMC for closure? perhaps a mother's day gift guide to help ignite momentum?

fingers crossed. here we go...

 above: 1). may you never shot glass set; 2). scarf in mustard dots; 3). white knit beret; 4). gold tone knot earrings; 5). thomaspaul tablet/ iPad case; 6). chemex coffee maker; 7). vintage yellow and white enamel flower brooch; 8). crinkle bag vase; 9). clare vivier foldover clutch; 10). villa flats; 11). switch bluetooth speaker conference call speaker; 12). city clips - new york page markers.

happy mother's day to all of the mamas around the world! xoxo

while cruising down beverly boulevard yesterday, i nearly crashed my car when i saw this glorious MAD MEN SEASON 7 MURAL tumbling across the wall of the sofitel hotel.

the artist behind the technicolor, art nouveau masterpiece is iconic '60s artist milton glaser (age 84!). mad men's creator, matthew weiner, sought out glaser as his dream key art illustrator for the show's final season, and luckily for all of us, glaser agreed.

similar to enlisting the art of brian sanders for season 6, weiner truly celebrates and honors the master artists of the mid-century. the result is nostalgic, sophisticated, and exuberantly authentic. thank you, matthew!

but wait -- there's more...

AMC released mad men's season 7 character photos, and darlings, it is head-to-toe perfection.

from peggy's enamel daisy pin to gentlemen sporting various shades of mustard, i'm happily drunk in a sea of fringe and polyester. bring on 1969 and bring it on forever!

costumes by janie bryant. photography by frank ockenfels. enjoy!

{to see the entire gallery, click on over to AMC. remember, the season premiere is april 13th!}

best dressed. best speech. best liza minnelli encounter. best supporting actress.

i love this woman. congratulations, lupita!

hold onto your hair rollers, because tomorrow is the big night, kittens!

the gowns! the glamour! the betting pools (humble brag: i've won over $600 over the past 10 years).

thanks to london-based digitalrun media, we have this truly fabulous illustration bible, which chronicles the gowns worn by oscar winning actresses since 1929. some are iconic, some are infamous. study and commit to memory, darlings. there will be a test.

a few of my faves below. stay glamours, my friends:

above: bow down! audrey hepburn in givenchy. best actress: roman holiday, 1954. always and forever the queen.

above: bette davis works it out in tulle and gossamer "feathers" for her 1939 oscar win for jezebel.

above: the lovely vivien leigh poses with her oscar and dessert plate (two of my favorite things) for her gone with the wind win, circa 1940. (side note: how come red carpet ladies don't wear gown with prints more often?)

above: perfection - grace kelly in a gown by iconic costume designer edith head. film: the country girl, circa 1955.

above: in 1961, elizabeth taylor wins for butterfield 8. liz wears an ivory silk, embroidered ball gown, waist rose (and sash!), and see-through high neck yellow top. i would totally wear this. and my hair would look fabulous.

above: gwyneth paltrow wins in pink for shakespeare in love. gown by ralph lauren. an iconic dress is born, circa 1999.

above: quite possibly my favorite gown in the history of gowns. marion cotillard in jean paul gaultier neptune's muse dress (not the official name -- that's what i call it. jean paul, you're welcome to use it.), circa 2008.

i die.